When I saw my doctor last week, I said, “I know my life will never be the way it was before this all started. So I have to find a new life.”
However, I didn’t expect this second round of dis-ease to feel like I was pregnant with an alien baby, or worse Rosemary’s. But, it reminds me of just that. The symptoms are there, just like with my children, only intensified. It could be my age,
Take morning sickness. The medication I take twice a day at promptly 7 a.m. and 7 p.m. has a few side effects. The main one is nausea. So, like morning sickness, I eat saltine crackers and sip water. I can tolerate yogurt, but it’s not easy forcing yourself to eat immediately when you get out of bed.
My daughter and daughter-in-law are huge advocates of Zofran. It’s a drug that counteracts nausea. Back in the day, when I was having my children, all we got for nausea from the doctor was advice. “Go home, it’s your body adjusting to the pregnancy.”
Thanks.
The drug seems to be helping, so I have decided I need to stick with it. It does, as you may have guessed, have its own set of side effects.
My first nap of the day begins at 7 a.m. after I take the first dose of chemo pills. I don’t want to be awake for the side effects. Sometimes nausea lingers, and that queasy feeling follows me around most of the morning. Then, I might have a Coke over ice. After not drinking soda since 1972, I have consumed more in the past two weeks than in a lifetime.
Those of you who know me know I am a getter-done kind of person. I start at the crack of dawn and keep going until, like a shooting star, I crash at the end of the day.
These days it’s difficult to jump right into any project. I find when I move slower the side-effects don’t bother me as much. When I do finally get something done, it’s time for another nap. And maybe some days another nap right after lunch.
Then, there’s coffee. How I used to love that first cup of coffee in the morning. Sometimes I would go to bed dreaming of waking up to that fresh hot cup of caffeine. I like to meditate in the morning in the darkness, which isn’t very dark anymore due to the lights of Bismarck and all the new developments along Highway 1806. Sipping coffee in the darkness and contemplating the day — ahh. The best part of waking up.
Well, those days are over with. Sometimes I can’t stand the smell of the coffee beans as JC grinds them the night before. UGH. Rarely, and I mean rarely, do I get that sensation of latte lust from the smell of coffee lingering in the air.
I keep thinking I want to eat. So I cook. By the time I finish cooking, I seem to have lost my appetite, especially if there’s meat involved. That’s disappointing.
Oh, then there are cravings. Boy, I see an ad or a recipe online and obsess about something until I have to have it. One day it’s French fries, one day it’s chocolate shakes, but mostly it’s butter and salt.
Yep, can’t seem to get enough butter and salt. So I have been nibbling on corn nuts, and more saltine crackers during the day. My favorite of late is frozen veggies soaked with butter. You know, almost a butter soup with some peas in it.
Spicy foods are out. For some reason, I cannot tolerate spice like I used to. That’s sad because I love jalapeños.
My lower back aches, my upper back aches, and the bottom of my feet ache, especially when the weather changes. There’s been a lot of that going on lately. We may be in for a spring storm in the next week.
Like coffee, my taste for NA beer is completely gone, so I drink water all day. That means multiple trips to the bathroom. I’d probably get longer naps if that wasn’t the case.
I’m not sure how long the gestation period is for alien babies, but the side effects are way worse than when I was having human babies. So, it’s my new norm, probably for a long, long time.
That makes me wonder about this infusion port in my chest — is it an alien tracking device? When will they come for me…
I’m not sure how this tall tale ends, but you got me. I watch way too many science fiction movies. Next week it’s back to reality and the rest of 2023.
INDYchildrendotme 
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