Cancer
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Investing in Quality: The Importance of Good Foundation
Quality comes with a price, and some things are worth the extra time and money, including bras. No, I did not return to Victoria’s Secret in pursuit of undergarments. I opted for a department store, but I still experienced sticker shock, even with a half-price sale and deep discounts for being a credit card holder. Continue reading
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North Dakota Winters: Community, Grief, and Gratitude
Winter dropped. Not gradually, but in one day, we went from sweatshirts to ski pants. Here we are, beginning the Christmas season with snow and cold. Hopefully, you were one of the prepared and put those Christmas lights outside before the storm. Tomorrow, we gather with family and friends for a Thanksgiving feast, followed by Continue reading
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Two months to get rid of Wilbur T. Fred
INDY Children began as a way for me to play Jeopardy with my children. I would supply the answers via blog posts, recipes, old photos and stories. You know, categories. When I am gone and they can’t call their mom and ask, “How do you do that?” The answers would be available digitally. Or at Continue reading
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From Tornadoes to Life Spirals: A Journey of Memories
On Sunday, I had the privilege of attending the Simile Middle School production of The Wizard of Oz. And, what does one think when they think of the Wizard of Oz? Tornados. Our area has had its share of tornadoes this year. Tornados are like spirals, or are spirals more like tornados? It is a Continue reading
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The Last Bouquet: Clearing the Garden and Mind
Way back. At the beginning of summer, I sowed a 90-foot row of zinnias. The seeds are a combination of my saved seeds and gifted seeds from my Aunt Laverna. She has been saving those Dockter family seeds since her grandmother’s day. Zinnias are easy to grow. The colors, sizes and shapes of each bloom Continue reading
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Leavin’ the Garden of Weedin’
Yes, it’s time to say goodbye to the summer, and it’s about time. October is my favorite month of the year. The 10th month of the year provides chill nighttime temperatures for a relaxing sleep. During the daytime, the temperatures have been in the 70s, sometimes reaching the 80s, making it perfect for a walk-about Continue reading
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Cherishing Small Town Memories: A Grandmother’s Reflection
APOLOGY: I am so sorry this is late. This is a busy time of year, and I am preparing to do one more market before the freeze, when my attention will turn to cleaning out the gardens. And, I’m so disappointed I cannot find that photo of me as a cheerleader.) Maybe not all of Continue reading
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The Joy of Fall: Homecoming Memories with Cheerleaders
PS: Next week I will post a photo of me as a cheerleader. I don’t have access to it at the moment. I hope I can find it. What wonderful weather comes with the autumnal equinox. Warm sunny afternoons and chill evenings, just right for bonfires. With the changing season comes school. With school, there Continue reading
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Harvesting Memories: A Journey of Resilience
It has been quite a year. Here we are approaching fall, speculating on whether winter will be mild or cold and snowy. The gardens are nearly done producing, and the root cellar has been restocked as the pile of empty jars goes down to nearly nothing. An awesome trade-off. Speaking of trade-offs, I have accomplished Continue reading
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Embracing Creativity: My Journey to Fargo
It’s already Thursday, and I am still struggling to complete a blog post. Well, this is my week of storytelling in person, rather than virtually. On Tuesday, I presented on my mission trip to Estonia. Today, I am in Fargo at the Sanford Survivorship Retreat. I took this opportunity to leave on Wednesday and spend Continue reading
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Exploring Estonia: A Journey Through Culture and Spirituality
Twenty-one quarts of salsa and 14 quarts of dill pickles later, and I am finally feeling free of the brain fog and fatigue from traveling to Estonia. Oh, I’d better include mention of a couple of 12-hour nights under the quilt. It seems that the days have shortened considerably in two weeks, and nighttime temperatures Continue reading
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Exploring Estonia: More Observations
Words cannot express. I’m back from Estonia. Yikes, 24 hours on three planes with three-hour layovers is exhausting. It might take me a few days to get back in the saddle; however, there are tomatoes, beans, cucumbers, and more patiently waiting to be eaten or processed. I will see how long I last today. One Continue reading
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A Memorable Journey: History and Community in Tartu
Tartu, Estonia: Sunday, August 10 It’s been a whirlwind of a couple of days. But, here I am in for the first time in my life outside of the United States. There was time today to walk the streets of Tartu. We have had plenty of interaction with each other and with our Estonian hosts Continue reading
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Challenges of Gardening (and breathing) in Extreme Weather
This was a good year to cut back on farmers markets. With the damage in my lungs and current medication, I have become sun sensitive, heat sensitive, and unnaturally tan. While it hasn’t stopped me from weeding and harvesting in the early morning, standing in the parking lot in this heat would be very uncomfortable. Continue reading
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In the Garden of Eatin’
My mother cared for the enormous garden behind our house in Fredonia, N.D. She spent hours tending those vegetables, and a strawberry patch of about the same size next to it. One year, to ward off the robins, my dad sat on the back steps and shot the first bird taking advantage of the red Continue reading
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Empowered by Faith
Sometimes I think people don’t understand. Doing things, even those that are outside of my comfort zone, is what keeps me going. It normalizes my life between those dreaded CT scans and brain MRIs. I am not immobilized by my disease; I am empowered by it. Which, on a side note, my next CT scan Continue reading
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From the farmer’s field to the mission field
Somehow, everything changes after the Fourth of July holiday. I can’t explain it, but even the weather seems to react to the shortening days. My garden has been loving the rain and there are signs of harvest popping up all over the place. Many of you know I decided to take some time off from Continue reading
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Weaving Success: My Artistic Journey began at Art in the Park, Mandan
My first job in Mandan was at the Mandan News and Finder. It was back then, in the late 1970s, that I was introduced to the town that celebrates the Fourth of July like no other. There were decorations, fireworks, rodeos, children’s events, and Art in the Park. It was at a booth in the Continue reading
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The Joy of Watching Grandchildren Grow
There is no greater joy than grandchildren. Somehow, while raising my children, I missed out on observing how a child progresses from non-communication to endless questions and observations. My friend Shelley maintains we are too busy as moms making sure they are fed and cared for to notice the nuances of the toddler stage. Being Continue reading
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Small victories and big heartaches
It’s June. I’m celebrating in a small way today. The month of May has passed, and I did not have a single lab, scan, MRI, or doctor’s visit for the first time since December of 2022. In years past, hospitals, clinics, and labs were minor annual blips on the radar of life. Doctor’s visits were Continue reading
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The gift of cancer
Many illnesses are not outwardly obvious, but dealing with them becomes a part of life, and you do what you have to do. Cancer is one of those things. It may not be easy to understand what feelings run through someone’s head after a cancer diagnosis. Or maybe it is. We all have an opportunity Continue reading
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Lessons from ‘Warning’ by Jenny Joseph
Remember the poem everyone called “When I Am an Old Woman?” It was written in 1961 by a 29-year-old woman named Jenny Joseph. The poem’s real title is “Warning.” If you are not familiar with this poem, here ya go. When I am an old woman I shall wear purpleWith a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me.And I shall spend my pension on brandy Continue reading
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Celebrating Small Victories
Again, with Tom Petty (he’s a heartbreaker) and the lyrics to another song he produced —Sure as night will follow dayMost things I worry ‘boutNever happen anyway The song “Crawling Back To You,” was probably not written about crawling back to Jesus, but somehow the lyrics could easily mean whomever you trust to be there Continue reading
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Miss Sue goes to Washington
Like Mr. Smith, my first trip to Washington D.C. was an adventure. Who’s Mr. Smith, you are asking? Remember Jimmy Stewart in Frank Capra’s “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington.” Mr. Smith’s story opens with the death of a senator. When contemplating a replacement, Hubert Hopper, the governor of some western state, appoints an unknown Boy Continue reading
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Finding Sunshine
It seems winter has returned to our area bringing colder weather and the potential for snow. We sure could use the moisture. The cold, I am not so certain, has agreed with me this winter. I asked JC never to go south in the winter and play cards on picnic tables while golf carts buzz Continue reading
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A Year of Healing: Birthday Reflections After Cancer
March is a month of birthdays in our family. Growing up, my dad did not acknowledge birthdays. When the subject was broached, his answer was, “It’s just another day.” There were no huge birthday parties growing up. No mountains of gifts, and no grandparents in attendance, but we did get birthday cake, I think. When Continue reading
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Spring Renewal: Gardening and Recovery After Cancer
RSV + pneumonia + Daylight Savings Time + lot of schizophrenic weather = three weeks of “la-la land.” I’m finally beginning to come around and take care of my commitments. I was delighted that I made it through the first quarter of this year without having radiation or additional chemotherapy. Feeling good, naturally, I said Continue reading
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A time of German-Russian purgatory
When man plans, God laughs. It’s been eight days since my hospital stay. Eight days of German-Russian purgatory. For anyone joining me on this cancer journey, I recently posted my long list of commitments for the year, trusting I would be well enough to follow through. I was feeling so normal I filled my calendar Continue reading
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I’ve seen the end and it ain’t pretty
Ever had the wind knocked outta your sails to the point of capsizing the boat? It has been such a couple of weeks. I have spent hours gathering my thoughts to put down in words. I have seen the end and it ain’t pretty. The past two weeks have been colored with grief at the Continue reading
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Elsa Dutton’s Wisdom: Faith and Purpose in Life
1 John 5:14-15“And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him. And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for.” I think I was born too late. True, TV westerns romanticize the past, Continue reading
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Embracing Life During Cancer: My Journey Forward
Somehow when you are painfully aware that you are in the winter of your life with a non-curable disease, you think almost daily, “What should I do now?” There are so many things I want to do or be a part of. What do I do? By nature, I am the type of person who Continue reading
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Finding Peace in the Cold: A Personal Health Journey
Creeeaaaaaccccckkkk. My heart skipped a beat at the sound of an unfamiliar crack. A very loud noise. The house at last surrendered to the weight of the cold that blew in overnight. It settled over the area like a weighted blanket. Below zero kind of cold creates a hush. It was quiet, as if Continue reading
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Gamma Knife Surgery: A Milestone in My Health Journey
We passed a couple of major milestones this weekend. I don’t want to be reminded how the past two years changed my life, but my husband did. In face, I would not have remembered January 11 if he had not invited me to lunch to celebrate. “Celebrate, my head in a box?” I asked. I Continue reading
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Christmas bells. Cancer bells
Sometimes, reality sets in. None of my doctors have ever given me a timeline for my cancer’s course. I have never asked. It’s between God and me. I’m trying to move forward without dwelling on what happens next. So far, it’s been excellent news. We share that news at a group I zoom in on Continue reading
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Finding Joy in December: Reflections on Life and Love
It’s Sunday, December 8, and there’s rain in the forecast. Very little snow and no cold makes it difficult to believe it’s December in North Dakota. Cold is relative, of course. When we say it’s not freezing in North Dakota in December, we mean it’s not below zero with no wind chill. Preparations are underway Continue reading
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Thriving Through Anxiety: A Thanksgiving Reflection
It’s 4 a.m. I can almost smell the cup of Earl Grey waiting to be brewed as part of my morning ritual. “Is it too early to get up?” I ask myself before the next glance at the clock reads 5:37 a.m. That’s a reasonable time to get out of bed and enjoy quiet time Continue reading
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Early Detection: The Key to Lung Cancer Survival
November is Lung Cancer Awareness month. It will be two years in January since lung cancer derailed my life. I’ve been picking up and rearranging pieces ever since. Once I began the chemo/radiation regime in early 2023 I had no expectations of living out the year. Here I am, a different person, with a wholly Continue reading
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Halloween Memories: A Journey from Costumes to Creativity
It used to be that Halloween was my favorite holiday. That’s right. You woke up and said, “Oh, it’s Halloween.” Then, while the children were at school you decided what you were going to make for costumes, and carved your best pumpkin with triangles for eyes and a toothless half-moon smile. Then you went to Continue reading
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Cancer changes everything. No. Cancer changes me
My mother’s health began to fail at the age of 80. I began to spend as much time as possible with my parents by stopping at their home in Jamestown while taking road trips for my job. My brother lived in the same community and this gave us the opportunity to connect weekly, if not Continue reading
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Believe it or not, I’m at a loss for words this week.
My journey began in January of 2023. As fall slowly creeps into our overnight temperatures, I’m coming up on two years since the day my doctor called and told me the news. She sounded apologetic. It was after 5 p.m. She called a surgeon she worked with to please review the chest X-ray. He followed Continue reading
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Cancer, Gratitude, and God’s Tender Mercies
After a challenging week involving medical procedures and family events, the author expresses gratitude for their home, health, and support. Despite the ongoing battle with cancer, they embrace each day as a precious gift, drawing inspiration from a poem and their faith. The author encourages others to cultivate a spirit of gratitude and kindness. Continue reading
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Navigating Health Challenges with Faith: The Power of Prayer
We leak. It’s 3 a.m. Monday morning. My throat hurts. My left ear is throbbing. My eyes are wet but there are no tears on my pillow. There’s a storm brewing in the pit of my stomach. The peace of the past four days has dissipated like the morning mist on the windows from the Continue reading
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Fulfilling My Longtime Dream: A Journey to Alaska Amidst Cancer
Here is a scan of a yearbook photo from 1973 of my science teacher, Mr. Bryan Dinkins. I wish I had paid more attention to my studies back then; of course, I didn’t realize how much I used math and science in baking, sewing, weaving and almost everything else I do. If you can see… Continue reading
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Living with Lung Cancer: Navigating Memory Loss and Hope through Poetry and Puzzles
Tumors in the brain make you painfully aware of the memory loss associated with chemo and cancer. I’m always reading, writing, and playing word games to hopefully use up some unused portions of my brain that aren’t under attack at this time in my life. I feel like I am doing fairly well memory-wise, but Continue reading
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Cherished Memories: Small Town School Days, Rekindled Friendships, and Sentimental Reflections
Between doctor’s appointments, trips to Mayo, MRIs, and CT scans I have time to contemplate my life. Mostly things in my past. It must be my age. It’s also been a blessing tho, since my diagnosis, many old friends have reached out and we reconnected. I appreciate all the prayers, cards and texts. I even Continue reading
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Witnessing the Power of Prayer and Healing | Encouraging Update on Tumor Progress
SEEING THE FOREST FOR THE TREES It’s true. They say sometimes you cannot see the forest for the tree. It’s very true. Sometimes you cannot see the big picture when surrounded by all the stuff that gets in the way of your view. Details, feelings, other people’s feelings. It’s been one of those weeks. I’m Continue reading
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Overcoming Loss: The Story of ‘Dan’, a Resilient Tree and Symbol of Hope
I love plants. My house is full of plants. If a leaf drops and you leave it lying on top of the soil it becomes another plant and they continue to grow and reproduce until you have a houseful of plants. The front of our house has a long porch with lots of windows. Those plants love it out Continue reading
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Winter is coming
The Stark family’s words, “Winter is coming,” resonate as the author reflects on entering the “winter years” of life post-cancer treatment. Facing uncertainty and limitations, they share lessons learned: cherish family, be generous, embrace individuality, and live in the present. Embracing this new phase gracefully, they find solace in focusing on what they can still… Continue reading
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Another heartbreaking email
It’s been a couple of weeks and I have had something I need to get off my chest. Whether or not this is the platform for such a story remains to be seen. I will write this and then skip on to the happier part of 2023. It’s a painful thing that has to do with cancer and other more important matters of Continue reading
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Uncle Ed
Uncle Ed is my father’s youngest brother. Shortly, way too shortly after my brother passed unexpectedly, and for unknown causes, there went Uncle Ed on June 3. I was heartbroken. You see, every uncle and each aunt contributed something to the person I am today. Every loss affects me differently, but this one was particularly Continue reading
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The Effect of Gamma Rays on Man-in-the-Moon Marigolds
“After radiation is better understood a day will come when the power from exploding toms will change the whole world we know. Some of the mutations will be good ones – wonderful things beyond our dreams – and I believe I believe this with all my heart, THE DAY WILL COME WHEN MANKIND WILL THANK Continue reading
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Normal is a setting on your washing machine
During treatments, I was encouraged to live as normally as possible. Not that my life appeared normal from the outside looking in, but I tried. After all, normal is just a setting on your washing machine. Sometime in March, after Claire returned to South Dakota, I mustered enough energy to start my seedlings. There wasn’t Continue reading
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Radiation treatment — the gift that keeps on giving
“What ya going to write about now?” My daughter asked after I posted the “Ring My Bell” video and wrote about that final day at the Bismarck Cancer Center in April. Well, my dear, radiation was not the end of my torrid tale of 2023. It was only the beginning. Besides, words circulate in my Continue reading
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The end is near…
The end of the year is near, but the story of 2023 continues. I could not write about the year while living it. I’m not sure why I need to record the events that transpired, one after another, but I think it is imperative to “get 2023 out of my system.” Writing affords me a Continue reading
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How do you tell someone you have cancer?
(PS: The ND Fighting Sue logo was done by my granddaughter Elle. They were planning a fundraiser Tee Shirt, but instead, the whole family wore their Tees at Easter time. That was my first venture out in the real world since radiation began.) My father died in September 2022. I was relieved I didn’t have Continue reading
About Me
I love to write. My background is graphic arts and journalism. My roots are German-Russian from McIntosh County, North Dakota.
My time is spent reading, writing, gardening, cooking, blogging, fiber arts – you name it, we try it.
INDYchildrendotme 